Seems as though I’ve been coming across some verses in the Bible dealing with being thirsty lately. Most of which are pulled from the book of John. In chapter 4, Jesus meets a woman at a well, he asks for a drink and it leads to a conversation about what Jesus calls “living water” and never thirsting again. How can this be? The claim that Jesus makes (NEVER. THIRST. AGAIN.) is impossible and outrageous to say the least…or is it?

We can thist for more than just water. We can allow other things to grow our lives. We thirst for a lot of things, money, stuff, cars, video games, homes…these are all material things. What about the other things we thirst for? The things we can not touch, the things we can not build with our hands. What about the deep level things that can make or break us? Some of us thirst for acceptance, love, community, a safe place, stability, peace, contentment, satisfaction….the list goes on. It seems everyone I know has a void that they are looking to fill. They are not satisfied with the way they look or feel. They’ve filled their lives with spouses, children, self-help books, alcohol, drugs, relationships and a seemingly eternal list of things that just don’t cut it. We ALWAYS THIRST FOR MORE. Enough is NEVER enough.

Jesus poses a solution.

Read on in the story. The woman asks for this eternal thirst quenching super water, so that she doesn’t have to keep laboring uphill both ways to draw water from this well anymore. She. Simply. Doesn’t. Get. It.

Jesus doesn’t correct her, it seems he changes the subject. He tells her to go get her husband and come back. Her response? “I have no husband.” Jesus then goes on to tell her how she has had 5 husbands and the man she’s shacking up with now isn’t even one of those. Taken aback, she quickly tries to get the focus off of her, redirecting to a religious and cultural view. Jesus was a jew, through and through. She was a Samaritan. Jews and Samaritans don’t play well with each other, much less give each other water! 

Here, is where Jesus pulls it all back together. He doesn’t mention being thirsty, he doesn’t mention water. He goes right in for the resuscitation, not the kill (see what I did there?).

Jesus:: “…a time is coming and HAS NOW COME when the true worshipers will worship the Father in the Spirit and in truth, for they are the kind of worshipers the Father seeks.” John 4:23 NIV2011(CAPS mine)

 Woman:: I know that Messiah is coming, and when he does HE will EXPLAIN EVERYTHING to us.

Jesus:: This guy, the one you’re chatting with right now…I AM he.

You see, Jesus already explained EVERYTHING to her. He told her that he was the missing piece to her spirit and soul. He told her that she was seeking acceptance and love in all the wrong places. He told her that it really doesn’t matter whether you’re a jew or not. And He told her that there is HOPE, that there is life beyond the miserable existence she was living…or should I say dying? Jesus reveals to a woman who is not Jewish that he IS Messiah, he is the Savior of the world!!! He explained to her that the “living water” he speaks of is the Spirit, that he is the Way to worship in the Spirit and truth.

Jesus is the water to all the things we thirst for, spiritual, physical, and mental. Christian, non-Christian, Atheist, Budhist, Muslim, Daoist…whatever. There is a void in your life. Jesus is the filler. Not only will he satisfy your every want and need, he will become in you a “…spring of living water welling up to eternal life” John 4:14b NIV2011

May you be thirsty, and may you find eternal satifaction.

Posted in Uncategorized | Leave a comment


so much wonder in a day. i wonder why i feel the way i do at times. i wonder sometimes if God really cares. i wonder, sometimes.

i’m not afraid to question my beliefs. i’m not afraid to not have all the anwers. i believe what i believe, and sometimes…i wonder about that.

i wonder what hurt in your life has caused you to do some of the things you do? i wonder why you may be so nice to so many…or so few. i wonder why hate burns through your veins while you say that we worship the same Jesus, God of all, God of love. i wonder why your self-righteousness drives people awa..wait, no i don’t.
i wonder why we can’t learn to love and be loved.

however. i. do. not. wonder. why. folks. don’t. believe. in. God.

i believe in God. it’s my choice. don’t argue me on it. it’s the way i choose to live. if you do not believe in God, i believe that He believes in you. i believe that He loves you. no. matter. what.

i wonder why smart people allow ignorant people to shape their beliefs. i wonder why there is no wonder in this present culture. i wonder why there is no imagination, just copies of other peoples ideas. i wonder why i feel the way i feel. i wonder why it sometimes feels like God. has. walked. away.

i wonder what it is that drives you. i wonder what your passions are. i wonder why the homeless bum isn’t anymore important than the wealthiest of the wealthy, but then again…i know that he is.

i wonder what makes your gears turn. i wonder what causes you to have deep thoughts. i wonder if you even have deep thoughts. i wonder. i ask. sometimes, i’m answered. sometimes, i’m not. i wonder.

i wonder.

Posted in Uncategorized | 1 Comment


So, I really didn’t know what to write about until my fingers began to dance across the keyboard.  “This could be the worst blog post ever”, I thought. Oh well, here we go.

Freestyle? Yeah I said it…as defined by, option 3;  a performance or routine featuring relatively free, unrestricted movementor intended to demonstrate an individual’s special skills or style, as in figure skating, gymnastics, or surfing. I might add that the word has been used in art, music, and all other types of things. So, let’s apply this definition to life…To live a freestyle life? Can you or I live a life that is unresticted, intended to demonstrate our special skills or style? I believe so. As a matter of fact, I believe that each of us were created to live such a life. We were born with all that we need to be, for lack of words, us. There is no one like you. There never has been, nor will there ever be. In all eternity, there is only one you.

I believe, especially here, in the western world (that would be a cool amusement park, “WESTERN WORLD”), we try way too hard to be someone that we are not. The quest to be comfortable in our own skin has become to be in someone elses skin. It DOESN’T WORK!!! Men, we all can’t be MMA fighters, besides, that would be an angry, pissed off world that no one wants to be part of. So, you have some extra testosterone…go for run! Ladies, you all can not be supermodel skinny. My personal preference is that you are not, and most guys I know feel the same.

There is a God who created us all, in His mysterious image. Believe it or not. Seek it out! Don’t just write it off as religious fanaticism. I do not agree with religion. In fact, my life is becoming so freestyle that it doesn’t matter to me what kind of life you choose. I choose to love you, regardless of wether I agree with your religion, lifestyle, sexual preference, or anything else that we’ve been taught that God hates. The fact is God hates sin, and EVERYBODY DOES IT. That DOES NOT MEAN THAT GOD HATES YOU. IN FACT HE LOVES YOU DEEPER THAN ANY EARTHLY LOVE COULD AFFORD!!! It’s my goal to love like the one true God. I honestly love you, all of you. I want you to know this God, who wants to take up residence in your heart. I don’t know how He does it, but I know from experience, He does. And when you really, honestly seek Him, he leads you to yourself. He somehow activates all the hidden things that He’s uniquely created you with, and the real you begins to emerge. After 18 years of calling myself a Christian, I am just now learning that God doesn’t care about all the do’s and don’ts of life. He just loves you, DEEPLY. He wants to come in, and spend eternity loving you. And it’s a real love, it’s not what this world has to offer, it’s so much more than you could ever imagine. When you ask Him in, and accept the sacrifice of His son, Jesus, as he’s commonly known, He comes in and activates this spiritual person that you are that has been dead since the fall of man. You may think that you are spiritual, but trust me, you don’t know what spiritual is until you come face to face with the Creator, and He wants to live in your heart. No other god, deity, prophet, or teacher offers that. All others gladly slap the chains of a law, with rituals and other rhetorical things to make us good girls and boys. In Christ, there is no law. There is only freedom. His blood made everything perfect again. There is no seperation between God and man anymore. In Christ, you become a child of God, with all the benefits.

God is the God of freestyle. He has made us all to be uniquely ourselves. He’s the Creator, he knows how you work better than you do. Seek Him, when you find Him, ask Him to reside in you. He will begin to clear all the junk that you’ve filled yourself with and show you who you really are. He will guide you into the freestyle life.

Love to all, for you are my brothers and sisters.

May God richly bless you…I mean it!


Posted in Uncategorized | 1 Comment

SELF Destruct…

Hey gang! This is my first post here on Thefumesofselfishpride.  I got the name from a song lyric that reads, “…forged in the fires of human passion, choking on the fumes of selfish rage.” I chose to use the word pride instead of rage, because it is our selfish pride that kills us. It pollutes our ability to love one another. We, as a society, have become so selfish that no one else matters.  I hope to change that. I’m starting right at home, with myself.  I’m taking out the pollutants in my life, getting rid of my selfishness,  so that I may love the ordinary folks I meet every day with no judgements or “what’s in it for me” attitude.  I’m going green with the air around me. Selfishness is toxic, and it kills.

Now, the only way that I have found to rid myself of selfishness is moment by moment surrender to God. Notice, I didn’t just say Jesus, or The Holy Spirit… I said God, the whole entity.  The Spirit of God has been showing me some cool things about himself lately, and I will be sharing them with you all real soon. Until then, I encourage you to ask God to show you the places in your life that you are not loving, and I’ll put money (that I don’t have) on it that in those places are selfish wants and desires.  Ask God to help you get rid of yourself, so that His Spirit can dwell inside of you and teach you to love, the REAL way.

Breathing clean air…FINALLY!!!

Posted in Uncategorized | 1 Comment